How to Make Bacon (minus massive mess)

mmmmbacon

I sent my brother a birthday text, we ended up arguing over crispy vs limp bacon. He says: “I like the juicy bacon, not the crunchy hard bacon. Crispy on the edges but it should be almost fluffy.” What in the world? I don’t think we are related. Bacon should always be crispy. He says crispy bacon is bacon jerky.

Fired. He is so fired!

We spent about another reminiscing about our childhood and laughed and laughed and laughed for about an hour. Thanks to the convo with my brother, I realized my love for bacon started long before bacon became an internet meme… it was from our dad.

Our dad was an OG engineer and was borderline obsessed with bacon. My brother and I were crazy over bacon too. (My mom rarely ate bacon — she said it was too fattening. What a party pooper.) Fast forward about two decades, the internet pushed the popularity of bacon forward by uniting all bacon lovers (we are not alone!) And now, people who don’t like bacon are considered the ‘weird’ ones. Funny how things work. I also have a theory that nerds and geeks have a universal love towards bacon.

Wayne_Dixon_on_Twitter____Mona_I’m_not_big_on_bacon_at_all__I’m_not_human__I_know__

Anyway. I never made bacon at home because every time I did, the kitchen would turn into a disaster. I loathed the hours spent scrubbing the stove top from the bacon oil splatters, properly disposing the bacon grease, cleaning the pan, etc., etc.

A lot of people I know bake bacon but there is a simpler trick: microwave.

How to make bacon without a stove top grease explosion

Lay the bacon on a nest of paper towels and microwave for about 15 minutes (or however you prefer your finish to be: super crunchy or limp). Just eye the microwave as the fatty, pork goodness is cooked. Laying the bacon on a papertowel nest also absorbs a lot of the fats and oils too.

Easiest way to clean microwaves

To clean the microwave from the bacon grease splatters, fill a small to medium bowl with water. Add about 2tbsps of vinegar. Microwave for 5 minutes. Let the steam sit in the microwave and wipe down with a sponge or cloth. Voila! Like brand new. It’s MAGIC I tell you.

And there you have it fellow bacon lovers!
You’re welcome.

PS: a very happy birthday to my amazing brother. Siblings are the best. At least mine is 🙂

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