North Korea-o-Rama

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This has nothing to do with food or booze but it does have to do with Japan so I’m leaving a cluster of word vomit here. Over the past few months, tensions between N. Korea and the world are so high, Kim Jong-un keeps launching missiles towards Japan. I was freaked out for a bit but then I realized something.

This is from one of the many conversations between my younger brother and me (no filter, no editing, inappropriate foul language is present):

Me: So I’ve been thinking about the North Korea bomb situation. And how that crazy son of a bitch keeps fake launching miscles. Missiles? Shit I don’t know how to spell that darn word. Nucs. Bombs. Whatever.

Anyway. At first I was thinking about how I would survive if we are bombed. And then I came to the conclusion that it would be even worse to survive a bomb because it would be like, zombie apocalypse city where people would end up eating each other because of lack of resources. (If a nuc drops we are required to stay underground or in a shelter for a minimum of two weeks.)

Where would people go to the bathroom? What would we eat? My work building and apartment buildings aren’t prepared to keep people nourished and well for even three business days — how in the fuck would we survive 14 days???

Brother: i don’t think anyone is prepared

Me: Wait, hear me out. So then I was thinking about it a little more and realized that there is NO WAY a nuc would ever successfully be dropped on Tokyo for several reasons

  1. Japanese military is prepared so they will shoot down any bombs that are headed our way
  2. China and S. Korea are also prepared and whatever our relationship with them on the surface, we have to have each others’ backs for economic purposes — like the respective militaries are in talks with our other allies, so if Japan fails to shoot down the missile, China or S. Korea would be ON IT and vice versa.
  3. and most importantly, if N Korea does end up dropping a bomb on us, they will immediately be blown to bits by China, Russia or the US because they are all paying billions to N. Korea

Me: So it’ll be the best solution — getting rid of them and the entire country Which was my long winded way of saying I was fretting for a bit for nothing!

Brother: you have too much time on your hands weirdo

The end.

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One thought on “North Korea-o-Rama

  1. I worry a bit from time to time, but the reality is if they did launch a missile, they are so close – we’d have approximately 7 minutes before it arrives. Seven minutes. With a time-frame like that, do I think the Japanese government would even bother to warn Tokyo? I’m not so sure. Point being… life is dangerous. All we can do is live it like there’s no tomorrow.

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